Abagabo benshi bakunze kuvuga ko batazi ibyo abagore babo batekereza, ugasanga yarakaye cyangwa ababaye ukibaza icyo waba wakoze kibi cyangwa icyo utakoze wagombaga gukora, kuko byo ni byo umugore ntazicara ngo akubwire ko utakoze iki kandi muri we yumvaga ko ugomba kuba wibwirije.

Umugabo ugerageza kumenya imitekerereze y’abagore ntakunze guhura n’ibibazo byo guhangayika ashakisha kumenya aho yakosheje, icyo yavuze kibi cyangwa urundi rwikekwe urwo ari rwo rwose, kuko aba yamenye icyo agomba gukora.

Ntibigoye kumenya uko abagore batekereza kuko ahanini bahuriye ku bintu bimwe na bimwe bitari bike, byinshi muri byo abagabo benshi nta gaciro babiha ugasanga niho bipfira akenshi.

Bimwe muri byo…

Jya umwereka ko wamubonye kandi ugire icyo uvuga

Ni kenshi cyane abagore bataha bavuye kwisukisha imisatsi cyangwa se gusokoresha, yataha umugabo ntagire icyo abivugaho kandi bizwi neza ko abagabo benshi bakunda umusatsi, ndetse kenshi ari bo baba babikoreye (abagore babikorera abagabo). Cyangwa se ugasanga umugore amaze igihe ari kugerageza guta ibiro, ariko umugabo ntazigere abona ko hari uturo twavuyeho.

Ibi rwose niba uri umugabo ukaba utabyitaho umenye ko umugore wawe bimubabaza kandi ntazapfa kwicara ngo abikubwire, nta kindi yifuza usibye akajambo kamwe cyangwa tubiri umwereka ko wabonye ko hari impinduka yabaye ku mubiri we ndetse ugire icyo uyivugaho.

Muganirize ku munsi wawe

Niba utashye utishimye cyangwa se usa nk’ufite ikibazo, ntuzatekereze ko umugore wawe atabibona, gusa aho burya abagore batandukanye n’abagabo, iyo umugore afite ikibazo umugabo yibaza icyo yakoze kibi ntanabone igisubizo, mu gihe umugore iyo abonye umugabo we atameze neza ahubwo aba afite ibisubizo nka mirongo itatu by’ibishobora kuba byamubayeho kandi bagatangira kubyigaho ngo babone n’ ibimenyetso. Ariko iyo utashye, ukamubwira muri make ikibazo ufite, wenda ukanamubwira ko wumva utiteguye kubiganiraho, bituma atajya mu bitekerezo bya kure akamenya ko agomba no kukuba hafi.

Mufashe imirimo imwe n’imwe utiriwe umubaza

Mufite abana? Nibyo koko umugore arabizi ko ari we ushinzwe gukurikirana imirimo yo mu rugo, ariko se uzi ibyishimo yagira asanze nibura wahinduye urubindo (pampers) rw’umwana mu gihe ahugiye mu tundi turimo utiriwe umuhamagara ngo areke ibyo arimo aze akore ibyo nawe washoboraga gukora.

Mu minsi y’ ikiruhuko nabyuka agasanga wamuteguriye ifunguro rya mu gitondo, bizamushimisha cyane, kandi iyo ni impano ihenze cyane kuri we ushobora kumuha. Abagabo benshi baba baraciye mu buzima bwo kwibana bivuze ko baba bazi guteka utuntu tumwe na tumwe, mujye mufata akanya ko gutekera umuryango wanyu uko mubishobojwe.

Mukorere bimwe wakoraga mukimenyana

Uko biri kose uzi ibyo ukorera umugore wawe bikamunezeza kurusha ibindi, hari abakunda indabo, hari abakunda ko mubajyana muri resitora nziza, witekereza ko ubwo yabaye umugore ari mama w’abana gusa, aracyari wa wundi wakunze kera, aracyakeneye ko umwereka ko ukimukunda nka kera, umukorere bimwe byose wakoraga mutarabana, kuko arabikeneye!

Ha agaciro ibitekerezo bye

Ntibivuze ngo umwereke ko wemeye ibyo avuze, ariko nibura umuhe umwanya wo kukubwira ibyo atekereza noneho munafate umwanya wo kubiganiraho, aho kugira ngo umwime ijambo yumve ko nta cyo amaze mu byemezo bifatwa mu rugo.

Bagabo rero, nimwita kuri ibyo hari byinshi bizakemuka mu ngo zanyu. Ibindi birenze ibi muzagenda mubimenya bitewe n’umwanya muha abafasha banyu wo kuganira, kuko mu kuganira umenya umuntu byisumbuyeho.